The hardest time to be sober? Not at all.


bar stool shadowWill it be hard for me, newly sober, not to drink on New Year’s Eve? Nope. My friends have asked me, and I’ve told them that.

It’s just one night of celebrations, which many people think is silly and overrated anyway.  Thankfully, there are now plenty of organized alternatives to getting blottoed. For example, lots of cities have instituted “First Night” on New Year’s, offering art, music, food, and other activities and entertainment.

Me, I plan to ring in 2009 with B. and my daughters. sipping sparkling water and cider, playing board games and watching tv as the new-and-improved ball drops in Times Square. Boring to some, no doubt. I think it’ll be fun.

Lately, truth be told, the hardest times for me to stay sober are those ordinary, everyday moments. After dinner, after the girls are in bed, when I’m left alone with my thoughts. When I risk getting too contemplative, or bored. The temptation to dull my senses, to numb myself, is strongest then. That’s when an AA meeting, a reading in one of my recovery books, a blog posting, a call to a friend or my sponsor, or even a prayer (as best I can create one) —  is what I have to turn to. Instead of the bottle.

It’s becoming easier, but there are still moments when that pull is almost insurmountable.

For now, I’m just happy knowing that I will start the New Year well-rested and clear-headed, full of hope, fixing for my loved ones a big batch of chocolate chip pancakes.

4 Responses to “The hardest time to be sober? Not at all.”

  1. Yo C…

    Good on ya.

    Have a great New Year. Awesome to know yet another alcoholic is staying sober and recovering.



  2. Wow. Sounds incredibly level headed and un neurotic. Thanks for your kind words and I hope you and yours have a wonderful 2009 🙂

  3. hiya – found you from Irish Friend’s site. look forward to getting to know you through your blog. happy sober new year!!


  4. 4 K.

    Happy New Year, sis!

    Sounds like you had a terrific night; wish I could’ve been there for the chocolate-chip pancakes (I made blueberry ones this morning for all, with fresh-squeezed OJ and hot coffee).

    Wish I could be there in person to give you a hug; you’re my hero for 2009!

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